I have always failed to come to terms with death and loss, how someone who was a part of you can just be put in life’s recycle bin never to be encounterd in live form ever again.
There’s something about being quiet and still which enables you to notice things that missed your attention before.
We often drown our real thoughts and feelings because we’re afraid, afraid of facing the truth, afraid of facing the pain.
Today I’ve decided to take a moment of silence (and I hope you can find the time to take one with me) to just take stock of the loss.
It’s easy to go through life focusing on the tasks we deem as important, the things that will distract us, the things that will act as a salve for the pain.
This is just to remind you that your pain, your emotions your disarray related to your loss are important too, and you must take time to just grieve and grieve deeply at that. That’s OK too, it doesn’t make you weak. Your emotional well-being is just as important, and for as long as you’re not throwing a pity party do not allow anyone to tell you to suck it up without dealing with it and accepting the existence of your pain.
Find a healthy outlet for it, a journal, a creative project, anything that will help you feel better. I like to ‘write the wrongs’ away.
As I think and grieve about my loss today, here is an illustration that I found comforting last year. The irony is that there is life in dead things. The same way that you can make compost heap from dead plants and leaves and use them to enhance the growth of living growing plants is the same manner in which we must handle our losses. Loss has a funny way of propelling us, and we get to decide whether it is self destructive or it’s for your good, the good of others and the good of the legacy of the one/ones you have lost.